“Set the bar low and clear it”
– Dave Evans and Bill Burnett
I present you with my new mantra.
This might sound like a weird thing coming from a person who’s job it is to challenge you to go for what you want, think bigger, and do uncomfortable stuff.
But here’s the thing. If you’re like many of my clients, you’ve been an overachiever all your life. Working hard toward your goals is in your DNA. Either you’re all in or you’re out.
And sometimes that approach bites us in the booty.
Have you ever not done something because it felt so big you weren’t sure where to start and if you couldn’t do it “right” then why do it at all? Or decide to change 100 things at once because you’re all in, then found it way too much to maintain and let the whole endeavor gradually loose steam, never to accomplish anything significant?
Me too.
I’m kind of embarrassed by small goals. I’ll just say it. I’m not proud of it, but it’s the truth.
The problem is, when you’re trying to “boil the ocean” (do it all at once) you get worn out quickly.
I see this often when clients are trying to reclaim their schedule. If there’s a morning routine you really want, maybe don’t start with doing it every day. Start with Wednesday morning. Look forward to it. Block your calendar. Tell your family. Get consistent. Enjoy it. Let it start to feel natural.
Only after it feels as if you no longer even have to think about it do you add to it.
Go for consistency first. Consistency is born out of feeling like you’re making progress. Enjoying the process. Feeling things are achievable. Enjoy the satisfaction of checking off the box because it was easy enough not just do it once, but to keep doing it.
Set the bar low and clear it.
You’ll hate it at first because it won’t feel like you’re making progress fast enough. It will feel too easy. My email list is filled with people (maybe like you?) who think if it feels easy, they aren’t doing it right. ????
But feeling easy and fun is (weirdly, I know) what we’re going for here.
No one goes from a packed schedule to a full Friday off over night.
But you can go from a packed schedule to protecting an hour once a week to take yourself out to lunch. Start blocking 15 minutes between morning meetings to give yourself space to breath. Schedule yourself “out of office” one morning a month to go swim laps because you love the water and miss it from your college swim team days.
Does it sound ridiculous to schedule ONE day a month for something you’d like to do multiple days a week?
My answer is – how much are you doing now? If it’s never, once a month would be a 100 percent increase.
So don’t overthink this. Start with doable and small.
What are you longing for right now? More space? More movement? More connection? More learning?
What is the smallest way you could add some of this to your schedule in the next week? (and by add, realize that may actually mean subtracting depending on what you want)
“Set the bar low and clear it.”
You’re doing enough. ❤️
XOX,
Raina
